SUMMON THE NSA!

Summon the NSA to your home for a FREE consultation on your civil liberties, terrorism, and (for a limited time only) a lecture from a middle-aged white guy about why this isn't funny!

NOW WITH 100% MORE CAVITY SEARCH!

Disclaimer: By clicking this button your browser will do a Google search for 3 randomly picked terms from a list of known words that the NSA monitors. These searches will summon the police and FBI to your house because, just like everyone living in America today, all of your digital transactions are being monitored.